September 2009
3 posts
April 2009
1 post
“Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.”
– Oscar Wilde
March 2009
97 posts
fmylife:
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a fight over the fact that I didn’t want to celebrate my birthday. She dumped me. FML
Most days I'm stuck somewhere between not caring...
(via ambivalently)
fmylife:
Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML
“When love is your problem. Nothing can solve it.”
– The Dream “Love Vs. Money Part 2” (via lalanii) (via quote-book) (via ashadeofgrey) (via shany) (via crazybeautiful) (via tilforever)
fmylife:
Today, I bought my girlfriend two tickets to a Broadway show that was coming through town she really wanted to see. I couldn’t attend with her due to work so she said she would take her mom. I found out later she took her ex. Now they’re back together, and I paid for the date that made it happen. FML
FML
fmylife:
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his college and when I walked into the dorm he was lying in his bed with another girl. When he saw me he simply said, “April Fool’s!” It’s March 19th. FML
fmylife:
Today, my boyfriend of over a year and I were discussing how neither of us is the other’s usual ‘type’. I explained that I usually go for insular asshole types and then asked him what made me different from his usual choices. He said ‘Oh, well, I usually go for the attractive ones.’ FML
A story from a friend
ellieh:
“I liked this boy in high school who was a huge U Conn basketball fan. I wanted to get him to notice me, so I decided that if I became U Conn’s biggest fan, he would like me. I followed college basketball everyday and whenever they won a game, I would wear my U Conn hoodie to school the next day. By the end of the season, I had watched every college basketball game and decided to turn in a...
fmylife:
Today, I’m listening to Katy Perry. FML.
[Chorus] I love you but fuck you, I love you but fuck you i love you but fuck you, kinda strange how you came at me I love you but fuck you, I love you but fuck you i love you but fuck you, things will never be the same with me
FML
Today, I was talked into having sex with my boyfriend of 4 years. I had always wanted to wait till marriage but my boyfriend convinced me otherwise. Once we were done, he said he could never marry me because I was not longer pure. FML.
(via)
“Either Way” Guster
You were almost...
I Hate Love →
“have you been cheated on? broken hearted? sad? if you loved someone very much but something happened between you and that someone then sign this petition and express ur hatred on love”
Haha.
“Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships.”
– Sharon Stone (via bitchville) (via gatekeeper) (via quote-book) (via missworld) (via killingbambi) (via tilforever)
Breakup Stories →
Danni’s old college friend Stephen, a jazz guitarist and a fixture in the downtown free-improv scene, had been living with a fabric designer named Jillian for seven years when he informed his friends that he was getting married. “Yeah, so, Jillian’s the love of my life at the moment,” he said, “and she really wants to make things official, so.” Jillian had lately grown impatient with Stephen’s...
“Pleasure of love lasts but a moment, pain of love lasts a lifetime.”
– -Jean Pierre Claris De Florian
Weird Sex Laws →
In Indiana: mustaches are illegal if the bearer has “a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.”
In Washington: it is against the law to have sex with a virgin under any circumstances (including the wedding night).
In Virginia: it is illegal to copulate in any position except missionary.
Because figuring out relationships isn’t hard enough already.
“Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to...”
– Anais Nin
(Don’t support torture… Ban love!)
Why Guys Hate Girls
1. Women expect men to be mindreaders. Here’s the rule, girls - tell your partner why you’re mad right away. Giving him the silent treatment will only create a void. 2. Women always need to discuss the relationship. Stop hounding your man. When he’s ready to take the next step, he’ll let you know. 3. Women always think they’re right. Sometimes it’s better to...
“Jealousy, the dragon which slays love under the pretense of keeping it alive.”
– (via)
Mixed Signals →
way too much effort required.
Low-Down and Dirty Breakups
Taco Hell “Being a creative and thoughtful girlfriend, I decided I’d surprise Brian, my then boyfriend, with an old-fashioned love letter. I even went out to the store to buy special stationery. After I’d finished writing about all the sexy and sweet things I wanted to do with him, I signed the letter with a kiss and popped it into the mailbox. Then, the weirdest thing happened — Brian just...
FML...extra
peterpanman:
fmylife:
Today, I was drunk at my nan’s birthday party. My boyfriend texted me asking if I could go out, to which I replied “No, I’m at my nan’s house.” He then dumped me, calling me a ‘cheating whore.’ I was confused, until I realised I’d mispelt nan and said “No, I’m at my man’s house.” FML
Oh drunk texting
Boyfriend Hate Poem
Boyfriends….You can never please them, You try so hard to impress…. But then SWOOSH! One day they love you, the next day they dump you. When its all said and done, You wish you’d never dated that sorry son… Met his parents they sure liked you. Whats wrong with mamas little boy? He said he loved me..Maybe not… Now the only thing I wanna do is hit him over the head,with...
“Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.”
– Charlie Brown